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Choices

I’ve been alive on this planet for around four decades now, and I have spent most of my time dabbling in different hobbies and interests trying to find something that would stick. From modeling to drawing, to personal training, to patenting a product, to making jewelry, I have tried so many different things to see if there was something that I could do with my life, besides spending 40 hours a week of it doing things I don’t want to do. When the going got difficult with every single one of these activities, I would simply give up. I never had a chance to see any of my initial work pay off in any way because I wouldn’t stick with it.

I always thought that “what I was supposed to be doing” would be so obvious that it would hit me like a ton of bricks. I really thought I would have this magical “a-ha” moment, and everything would simply fall into place, and I would know beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is what I was put on this Earth to do. But nothing like that ever came, so I continued to wander around aimlessly, hopping from one 9-5 job to the next.

But despite everything, there was one hobby/interest that never entirely left me; and that was writing. No matter how many other hobbies I picked up and let go, no matter how many times the idea for a story came to me, and I would allow it to fall away, being a writer/author was always calling to me. And I was always ignoring it. It was like the sweet, unconditional love from a lover who never gave up on me because he knew we were destined to be together, no matter how stubborn I chose to be. Maybe not today, maybe not next year, but someday he knew we’d be together again. So he kept whispering to me ever so softly, “I’m still here, and I will wait for you.”

That’s how writing feels to me. I’ve left it to pursue something else many, many times, but I always came back. Well, finally, I’m making a choice.

Many people are lucky enough to know what they want to do with their life early on. They are a prodigy at their craft from the age of three or whatever, and everyone knows this is their destiny. However, it isn’t like that for so many others.

Sometimes, it’s subtle. Sometimes, it simply waits for you to decide, “You know what? I’m going to choose this, and I’m going to see where it leads. The road may not be paved perfectly the entire time, but I’ll never know what amazing events could happen if I keep abandoning it before it has a chance to take off.” Sometimes, we have to choose to stick with something, no matter what. I was always afraid to “choose” something because I was always worried that I might change my mind later. That fear of missing out was keeping me stuck. It kept me stuck in old patterns, and it kept me stuck in my comfort zone. It kept me stuck in so many aspects of my life.

Being a writer/storyteller is something I’ve done since I was a child. I remember making up little stories and movies with my dolls as a kid. Each doll had his/her roles to play in my little story, and I would immerse myself into the thoughts and emotions of everyone involved so that I could understand why they did the things they did and why they reacted in the ways they did. It didn’t come to me as some booming “a-ha” moment where I just knew this was my destiny. I made a choice. It was that simple.

No one is coming to save you. No hidden talent is going to smack you upside the head and say “Hey! It’s me! Your destiny!” You have to choose it. You have to love it. And you have to stick with it, even when things don’t seem to be going your way. You pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and you try again. I’ll never forget when I read that twelve publishers rejected J.K. Rowling’s Harry Potter books before they ever saw the light of day. She didn’t let that stop her. She kept going, kept persevering, and look at her now. She’s a billionaire!

Whatever your dream is: DO NOT GIVE UP ON IT! Giving up on your dreams is a slow death for your soul. As long as you are still breathing, there is always a chance that you can create something that will change the world. And even if you don’t change the world, people are watching you. People will see you when you step out of your shell, and you will inspire them to follow their dreams. Isn’t it wonderful to think that because of you, someone didn’t give up?

But it all starts with you. It all starts with making that choice. Are you ready to do that? What else are you going to do with your life? Are you going to give up for good, or are you going to listen to your dreams as they whisper to you, “Follow me.”

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